Summer 2013 - FAMILY REUNIONS BOTH HAPPY & SAD! - Part 4

There have been difficult family gatherings this summer.  Two of the hardest were the occasions of the sudden and tragic deaths of two young people in our family:  Victor's niece Julie Deming on 27 April 2013 in Spokane, Washington (daughter of Elaine & Jim Deming)  and Adele's nephew David Morgan on 25 July 2013 in Salt Lake City (son of my sister Julene Manwaring Morgan Fasy who died of cancer in 2001).

Both were single.  Both were in their early 30's.  Both deaths left us reeling.  Julie's was a car crash and David's was a case of anaphylactic shock - direct cause of which is still unknown.  Both of them had passed through some difficulties in their short lives, trying to find peace & meaning in their own existence.  Both were gifted. Julie excelled in both basketball and track.  David was a talented linguist.   Both have left deep holes in the lives of their brothers and sisters and parents.  But both would have been welcomed home by a loving Heavenly Father and ecstatic family members who preceded them.

Humans still living can ask "Why??" for eternity.  I believe we will only understand that when it is OUR turn to be on the other side of the veil.  I am grateful that I have infinite and sure trust in my Loving Heavenly Father.  We all have our own feelings and reactions to the death of someone.  I believe there is no correct length of time to mourn or to "get on with your life."  I just know that some day we will understand.  If David and Julie could talk to us I am sure they would tell us they are fine....and not to be too sad....and that they are, in many ways, better off than we are here in mortality!

I found the following poem among the papers of  my cousin's wife's funeral (from a year ago).  I have modified it a little and want to place it here, even though I already did so on Facebook.

The poem (or I believe it may originally have been a song) is by David Harkins.

"We can shed tears that they are gone
Or we can smile because they have lived.
We can close our eyes and pray that they'll come back
Or we can open our eyes and see all they've left!
. . . .

We can remember them and only that they are gone
Or we can cherish their memory and let it live on.
We can cry and close our minds, be empty, and turn our backs.
Or we can do what they would want:
SMILE.  OPEN OUR EYES.  LOVE, AND GO ON!

One of the last things that David posted to his Facebook page was this:
     "Mend the place where fear and anger be.
      Choose love and live compassionately.
      Follow faith and serenity
      And by all means, help all be free!"

Because these are only two of 5 deaths that have touched Victor's and my life since the beginning of the year I feel more and more that we just cannot take our relationships for granted.  We just really DON'T know when someone will leave us!!    I hope we value each moment, work hard at NOT being irritated with one another, give generously of the things which are most important.  I am very grateful for  reunions like we have had this summer.   Let's all keep our blogs, our Social connections like Facebook, our e-mails, our face-to-face interactions going!    After all - we will take nothing but our relationships and our knowledge to the other side.  

Rest now,  Julie Deming and David Morgan